tinyholidays

New glasses. It started out normal… Also. How freaky is...

Fri, 12 Nov 2010 19:18:00 -0800

New glasses.

It started out normal…

Also. How freaky is this morph thing? Hypnotic and horrifying.

Dress my face!

Sat, 30 Oct 2010 18:18:00 -0700

The era of the pink glasses must soon end, I believe. Below, some replacement options under consideration. Do you have a preference for what you would like to look at on my face?

Eeny.

Meeny.

Miney.

Moe.

Waddya think?

polythene-sam: fuckyeaharresteddevelopment: skinaybetty:hammeri...

Tue, 08 Jun 2010 18:57:34 -0700

polythene-sam:

fuckyeaharresteddevelopment:

skinaybetty:hammerito:banalitycheck:nbaoffseason:thegreg:joemuto:

Dustin Hoffman and Jason Bateman on the kiss-cam at the Lakers game last night.

(via)

LOL WHAT

Look at the lady next to them looking at the jumbotron. You are one foot away. Look to your right.

Laff Hole 5th Anniversary Show

Thu, 03 Jun 2010 01:10:10 -0700

Just back from the above-titled show at Chop Suey. Laff Hole is put on biweekly by the People’s Republic of Komedy, who also do a weekly open mic, which I’ll be going to on Friday. Feeling out the local scene. Starting to meet other aspiring comics and remember their names and vice versa. Someone remembered my set from Comedy Underground on Monday, which made me feel a little embarrassed, since I fucked up the end of that set. But if they’re at PROK on Friday, they’ll see take two.

My major note for the show: ”Laff Hole featured one woman, and the joke of her sketch was someone beating her.”

Seriously, y’all. Comedy. 87.5% dudes. At least, that was tonight’s performance percentage. At open mic, there tend to be more ladies.

I was impressed by how much material everyone had worked up and how comfortable they were in their stage space. Laff Hole showcases people who have clocked their hours. So, even when I don’t necessarily feel into someone’s style of comedy, I still respect that they’ve put in the time and worked at it.

Dog Canyon Interview with Paul F. Tompkins

Wed, 02 Jun 2010 10:18:30 -0700

Dog Canyon Interview with Paul F. Tompkins:

A very good read, especially as an exploration of the state of comedy venues.

Comedy Underground: Week 2

Tue, 01 Jun 2010 09:45:09 -0700

When I woke up yesterday morning and looked at what I had prepared for open mic, I felt unsatisfied. It was too rambly, didn’t have enough of the little punches that I tend to use. So, I worked over those three minutes all day. For, like, 5 hours, at least. By the time I needed to catch the bus downtown, I had something totally other from what I had before. And this change-up led to me learning a valuable lesson. More on that in a second.

Got to the club, had a beer, the cool group of dudes from last week showed up. I learned their names. We signed up to perform and sat down. The manager decided to run the show guy-girl-guy-girl, so I got to go up about midway through, since that rotation expires pretty quickly.

I started my set. Briefly tried to pull the mic out but was a bit afraid of harming the set-up like last week and getting a reputation, so I just leaned timidly into the mic stand, which, you know, is bad. Set set set. Did about 10 seconds of standing there in the middle of it to make people uncomfortable. Then, when it got to the end joke, I completely blanked. I had reached the funniest part, and I had no idea where this was going. So, I wrapped up, ended on a soft laugh, and sat down.

Even after I sat down, it took me, like, a half hour to remember what I had meant to say at the end of that set. Also, I had a headache.

A couple of the guys in the group killed and did some crowd work, and I was really impressed, since I tend to get stuck in This Is My One Woman Show mode.

I wasn’t upset about my set, just confused. But I think that I learned something about how my brain works, and that is that I really need to sleep on material. Let those neural pathways soak overnight. It’s okay to make tweaky changes day of, but not the entire set. So, that’s fine.

I’m doing People’s Republic of Koffee on Friday, so I’ll get the chance to do this same set again, with the final punchline this time. Also, the dudes, who need some sort of collective name, were saying that sets at PROK run 5-6 minutes, so I’ll get the opportunity to push together my MaxFunCon stuff and last night’s hobbly broken stuff. And I’m looking forward to trying out a new venue.

polythene-sam: flipyeahflightoftheconchords: “…And I just land...

Sun, 30 May 2010 23:17:32 -0700

polythene-sam:

flipyeahflightoftheconchords:

“…And I just land there and spooned you.”

-Jemaine Clement

Bahahaha who drew this? It’s great. :D

Am seriously considering spending 30 seconds of tomorrow’s 3-minute open mic time just staring...

Sun, 30 May 2010 18:19:09 -0700

Am seriously considering spending 30 seconds of tomorrow’s 3-minute open mic time just staring at the audience and then cashing in on a moment of uncomfortable laughter when I speak again.

Too cheap?

This is why I'm going into comedy.

Thu, 27 May 2010 11:08:00 -0700

Phone conversation with my mom:

Me: I meant to call Dad while he was out here [on Pacific time], but I was busy during the evenings.

Mom: Well, I think he was out to dinner with clients anyway.

Me: See? He doesn’t need me.

Mom: No. But you’re always good for a laugh or two.

WTF with Marc Maron: “Episode 75 - Carlos Mencia” If...

Tue, 25 May 2010 23:15:00 -0700

WTF with Marc Maron: “Episode 75 - Carlos Mencia”

If you’re interested in comedy, you should be listening to WTF with Marc Maron. This show digs in, guys. Okay. Like, you know how you only listen to comedian episodes of Fresh Air? Or like how I only listen to comedian episodes of Fresh Air? Well, now you can just say fuck Fresh Air and listen to Marc Maron have way less annoying conversations. Like this one with Carlos Mencia, for example. Now, I have basically zero interest in Carlos Mencia’s work or material. However, as Maron notes, Mencia has a reputation for joke thievery. And Maron has a conversation with him about that reputation. And it’s good. Oh, it’s good.

1st Open Mic in Seattle: A detailed entry.

Tue, 25 May 2010 10:18:43 -0700

I had decided to spend this week scoping out local open mics. Not performing, just seeing what is what. After all, NBC taught me that knowledge is power. Or maybe that was Machiavelli.

Mondays are open mic night at Comedy Underground (www.comedyunderground.com). Saving the $2 bus fare, I walked the 5 miles from the apartment where I’m staying in Wallingford downtown to the club, which is about a mile south of Pike Place Market.

When I made it downtown, there was some time before the show, so I stopped in at a place advertising itself as “Seattle’s oldest saloon” and had a couple of Blue Moons. The guy on the stool next to me said that I looked bored and alone and bought me another beer while telling me about how he’s a PA on Deadliest Catch.

Back at the club, with about a half hour before start time, management opened up the rope to let everyone sprawl downstairs into the basement room. When I made it to the ticket-seller-dude, he was signing people up to perform. I hadn’t expected he would be doing that, since the website said that sign-ups happen an hour early. But I had to go up. I’d been debating it all afternoon. One part of me said You’re here to do comedy! Don’t waste time! And another part said Remember the plan! Remember POWER! I won’t pretend that those were all of the parts. So, I signed up.

I chose a seat in the dark room, reviewed my set, and wrote a new opening joke based on my drink with the Deadliest Catch PA. A gaggle of guys who looked to be in their early twenties were sitting near me. They looked like My People. So, probably emboldened by alcohol, I sat down with them and asked if they would be my friends for the evening. They agreed, and our tenuous relationship was formed!

It was the MC’s birthday, so we spent a few minutes on that, and then the show started. I don’t remember that much about the people who went before me, as I was busy jiggling my foot and thinking over my set. Since Comedy Underground gives everyone 3 minutes, I used the 3 minute set I worked up for MaxFunCon. And I know it really well. But I was still running it running it in my head. I managed to laugh a few times, though.

My turn came within the first third of the show. The MC announces your name, and you make your way to the stage. When I picked up the mic, the cord fell out of it. Great! I broke open mic! I said something about how I’d already fucked this up, figured out how to reattach the mic to the cord, and moved into my opening joke.

The lights didn’t look bright from my seat, but on stage, they definitely blinded. I could only see the people on either side of me. It was a bit like talking to yourself with a laughtrack. It seemed to go well in that people laughed at all the places they were supposed to laugh and I didn’t stumble over anything after, you know, destroying the equipment. I’ll definitely have to do it on this stage more to be able to gauge anything more than that.

Just like at MaxFunCon, I was fast. I need to realize that the awkwardness in my speech when I’m rehearsing at home completely disappears when I’m on stage. I just say everything, no ums and errs. And that cuts down on the time that the set takes. I’m sure I could have gone on and used the full three minutes, but I wanted to end on a good laugh, so I stopped at my stop line.

When I went off stage, I totally blanked on shaking the MC’s hand, and he called me out on it when I was halfway back to my seat. I told him I would high-five him, but he declined. And then he said that my glasses were sexy. I don’t know what I’m going to do when I eventually get new glasses. I’ve had these for 2 years now, but since I’ve moved a lot in that time, I keep getting new praise from new people for them, even though they’re pretty old hat to me. How will I top the pink glasses?

The dudes back at the table said my set went well. They went up after me, and I enjoyed their stuff too, since it was obvious that they were kind of tuned in to a similar vibe.

A lot of other acts were focused on pussy, dick, fart stuff. And the audience really liked a lot of that. It’s not something that I’m interested in, so it was nice to be sitting with a cushion of people with what seemed like a comparable perspective. I feel a bit guilty about it, but I think our biggest laughs were when someone started a bit with “What’s up with ____?” and when some dude totally bombed with a not-so-topical Michael Vick joke.

Anyway, I was proud of having tight, specific material, and I’m excited to work up a different 3 minutes of stuff for next week. I think I’ll definitely be making Comedy Underground a weekly event.

The Comedy Nerds Podcast - “Breaking Into Comedy...

Sat, 22 May 2010 17:31:27 -0700

The Comedy Nerds Podcast - “Breaking Into Comedy Early”

I’m kind of envisioning this tumblr as a record of my attempt to start doing stand-up. In that vein, I’d also like to keep track of comedy advice things that I encounter. So, here’s this week’s episode of The Comedy Nerds, in which they dispense some advice to a recent high-school graduate who wants to become a late-night talk show host.

One of their bits of advice I’ve heard a few times before. It’s to write ten monologue-style jokes every day, knowing that most of them are going to be awful.

I already have somewhat of a daily regimen going, but I think I’m going to add the ten jokes bit to it. So far, I haven’t made any effort to do anything topical. But trying to write some tight set-up, punchline jokes might help me to diversify and grow, so… I’m gonna do it, and I’m gonna start today.

The Avett Brothers - “January Wedding” I’ve...

Sat, 22 May 2010 11:09:00 -0700

The Avett Brothers - “January Wedding”

I’ve been singing this song to myself for about three weeks.

“She keeps it simple, and I am thankful for her kind of loving cause it’s simple.”

“And I was sick with heartache, and she was sick like Audrey Hepburn when I met her.”

If anyone wants to have a picnic and roll down some hills while we play this song in the background, let me know.

Thanks to their ad in The Stranger, I’ve found an open mic...

Fri, 21 May 2010 14:59:49 -0700

Thanks to their ad in The Stranger, I’ve found an open mic to check out on Monday!

My first time.

Thu, 20 May 2010 23:40:40 -0700

Today, I got paid to be funny.

Well, okay. I’m choosing to highlight that aspect. Basically, what happened is, this Comcast bro showed up at my apartment to, you know, sell his cable and internet services. But I’m a friendly lass, and we got to talking. I told him about how I own three galaxies, he told me about how he likes Nickelback. He asked why I had moved, and I said that I dropped out of grad school to become a comedian.

“Tell me a joke,” he said.

“Well, they’re more like stories than jokes.”

“Then tell me a story.”

“No, man, you got to pay to play!”

And so, he gave me a dollar, and I stood in my doorway and told him a joke about cyberbuttsex. And he laughed!

So, that was weird and fun and I felt pretty good about it. And I spread the gospel of Bamford and he got my email address. Even though I’m not sure that I could go out with someone who likes Nickelback.

I knew I should have bought some of those greens from the...

Thu, 20 May 2010 14:54:57 -0700

I knew I should have bought some of those greens from the farmer’s market yesterday.

Skinnimarink-a-dinky-dink, skinnamarink-a-doo. I love you! Hits...

Thu, 20 May 2010 14:49:00 -0700

Skinnimarink-a-dinky-dink, skinnamarink-a-doo. I love you!

Hits me in 3 territories:

1. Song from 80s tv show that I definitely loved, (Elephant Show).

2. Song with accompanying hand motions!

3. Song to sing in the morning (“I love you in the morning and in the afternoon”). I collect morning songs. I think it has something to do with usually getting up early and generally being chipper.

My Year Of Everything: B. E.

Mon, 17 May 2010 11:11:22 -0700

My Year Of Everything: B. E. :

A. G. G.

R. E. S. S. I. V. E.

A good friend of mine was feeling career-blocked last week, and he asked me for advice. I dusted off a pitch I’ve given a few times before:

Pretend you’re giving it all up and going back to school in a year. Act like you have one year to make it work before you…

"Dude, I stopped listening to you five minutes ago."

Mon, 17 May 2010 10:16:00 -0700

““Dude, I stopped listening to you five minutes ago.””

- Ultimate bro conversation in front of me on the way into Renne Library on the Montana State campus. Yes, I was carrying about 17 books. No, they did not hold the door.